Chapter 17
I went to the lake house after sentencing.
Nora came with me.
So did Karen, because she claimed there were “property details,” but really she wanted to see me walk through the door.
The house smelled like cedar and dust.
My mother’s curtains were still there.
Blue flowers.
Faded.
Beautiful.
I stood in the kitchen and cried.
Not gently.
Not gracefully.
Nora cleaned while I cried.
Karen checked windows while pretending not to cry too.
In the bedroom closet, I found a box of my mother’s letters.
On top was one addressed to me.
Emily,
A house is only wood until someone feels safe in it. Do not keep this place because of guilt. Keep it if it helps you remember your own voice.
Love,
Mom
I sat on the floor holding the letter.
May you like
My mother had left me more than property.
She had left me permission.
